so, i was driving on the road today, just cruisin' along to an old mix cd amanda gave me a while back, when, from out of nowhere, this old hot shot sporting a bright blue minivan starts riding my butt on the road! he eventually passes me in the rudest of ways, luckily though, i passed his sorry butt within seconds. i'm not an aggressive driver, don't get me wrong, i just like reminding people sometimes that they're not 'aaaaall thaaat' ;).
so today's entry, i decided, is going to be about egos, priorities, and toy story. yes, toy story.
let's start it off with egos. like my lovely introduction, i guess i've been noticing a lot of uproars of ego problems lately. not all in bad ways, though. i guess i'm just trying to say that i've noticed a few people in my life.. getting off track. thinking they're somewhat better to an extent? i don't know. i miss the way we all used to be in elementary school. when being better than someone else meant you had better pokemon cards to trade, or when your mom bought you the 64 pack of crayons with the built in sharpener you never used, even though you thought it was the coolest thing to hit the planet. nowadays, it's so different. and i'm tired of people thinking they're sooo cool for the weirdest reasons. i'll admit, i'm sure i've done it too. i'm only human. i have several friends who i've been desperate to hang out with and catch up with for a while, but they've either been too busy for me, or have come up with the craziest of excuses not to hang out. several was recent, and now that i think of it, one pierces my mind from a while ago. it's crazy to think we used to be so close, but because of one small change in her life, we might as well be strangers now. her life choices have led her to believe, basically, she's too good for me. and maybe she is, who knows. i still care about her as a friend and a person, whether she looks down on me or not. the recent ones i guess aren't too bad. it happens right? which leads me into my next topic: priorities.
i think the heart of inflated egos, are mixed up priorities. i know for a fact that mixed priorities have been my downfall plenty of times. especially now that it's summer, i can understand why people just can't get in the groove of what they normally do, who they normally see, and why they normally do the things they do. that's why everyone labels summer as 'the time of change.' from the time when school ends to the time when it starts back up again, we rack our brains thinking of what to do now that we don't have to worry about homework, or waking up early, or having to sit in one place for 6+ hours. so what else is there to worry about? uhhm.. just about everything else. and when we analyze the kinds of people we are, we start to think that maybe it's time for a change. change could be anything from a new haircut, to a new personality, and you'd be surprised how short of time both of those can take. and so priorities get all mixed up! whenever my priorities get mixed up, i lose contact with really good friends, or i start to question every move i make, or i get in fights with too many people. it's really tragic, to be honest. and so this summer, i've decided change isn't in my best favor. i like the girl i am, even though i'm still trying to figure out just what girl that is. and as for the place i'm in, i know things can get better, but things can also get worse. and if it's truly out of my control, why should i stress about it so much? in my life, through various forms of proof, i have seen that things do happen for a reason. and in the end, it'll all be okay.
"If you have fear of some pain or suffering, you should examine whether there is anything you can do about it. If you can, there is no need to worry about it; if you cannot do anything, then there is also no need to worry." -Dalai Lama.
I like that quote. I think it leads into the idea that no matter how large your ego may be now, and no matter how messed up your priorities may be now, in the end... it'll all be okay if you're passionate enough about what you want.
so, the third topic i decided to write about was toy story. my friends and i, lately, have been SUPER excited for toy story 3 to come out, because the toy story movies are honestly just flat out amazing. we grew up with toy story, and now that the 3rd one involved andy going off to college, we can't help but at least generally relate ourselves to it because as andy has grown with the toys, so have we! so, something else my friends and i have been talking about, is how the youngins of our time want to see it just as bad, when they weren't even in the womb when the first one came out! it's ridiculous, i'm thinkin that they could never get the full effect of the movie unless they grew up with it. ohhh how i miss those old days. oh well, i'm still superrr excited for the 3rd movie to come out. planning on going to the midnight premiere with some friends. jollly good!
so, now that i've covered all i had expected to cover... there's just one more thing that's been on my mind today.
i'd like to address it to you. today would have been a special day, and i'm racking my brain, wondering 'what if' and would have, should have, could have's. slowly but surely, i'm losing you. and in all my days, that's one thing i hoped to never do. please don't give up on me, in the end it'll all turn out the way it's supposed to, and all of this will be okay. honestly, what i wished you would have taken away from all of this, you hadn't. if anything i'm the only one learning which is honestly ridiculous at this point. i never said it'd be easy, i just said it'd be worth it. trust me, just this once.