So, uhm, it's me again.
Well.. I don't really know how to put this lightly, and considering the harsher circumstances, and the crucial aspects that play into this I.. I guess i'll just come out and say it:
My dog is not ready to die yet.
She may have the weakening body any 11 year old schnauzer does, but I swear her heart and mind are bound to her prime puppy days. She's been my best friend, nay, my sister ever since I could remember holding her, caring for her since the first grade up until now.
As I lay here with her heavy painful breathing, and attempts at throwing up fibers in her poor tummy that probably aren't even existant, all I can think of is talking to you. Thinking you know the right answer, and that you know you won't take her out of my life until absolutely necessary (aka. Never).
What may seem a little strange is that there will never come a day when I don't want to come home to a smiling little furry face bouncing down the hall to embrace me. There'll never come a day when hearing her now annoying barking, or running into her constantly in the hallways due to her tendency to get in the way, is something I'd consider ever letting go.
Of all the pain, heartache, and misery you've tested me with through time in these 17 years, I'm standing here on my own two feet telling you that letting go of this powerful, reliable source of happiness in my life is not an option. You can take away friends, you can allow turmoil between my family and I, but the moment you take my babygirl away from me is the moment I know you may have just crossed a line. Because.. Well, she's my everything.
Okay. She's a dog. But who elses dog comes in and steals my things, and uses my bed while I'm away? Who elses dog will share food with me, and let me talk to her like casual conversation? Who elses dog could ever be loved any outstanding amount, as I love my Sheela?
You won't find a little heart this big, even if you search the world. I promise.
So.. As a favor, a blessing, and a genuine prayer, keep this jotted down on your notes for now, okay?
Because letting her go out of my life this easily isn't something I'm willing to do.
Thank you for listening,
Love, Desiree
Ps. Her breathing has slowed and she's sleeping now. Hopefully you're putting your work to action.
Oh, and.. Amen.