so, have you ever wondered why everything in life seems so much more awesome when you're in the shower? yeah, okay, call me crazy for saying that, but hey! i mean, everyone can sing in the shower, right? and by that i mean everyone's actually somewhat talented in the shower, i'm not sure how that's possible but it happens, whether or not they sing outside of the shower. not saying everyone's pitch perfect, but for some reason a source of happiness is belting out a song under the water. also, i'm sure everyone can agree that the BEST ideas originate while we're in the shower. yet something strange always happens when later on, we forget what ideas or thoughts we had realized in the shower! for example: the idea i originally had for this blog. it was quite impressive, something i could go on and on about. i experienced it just this morning, and i considered writing it down, but unfortunately i didn't and so i forgot. so, i have decided to improvise with an idea that's been on my mind tonight, and in a general sense for a while. hopefully it doesn't put me down too much.
can you agree that there's a sense of accomplishment, or joy in making others happy? (i mean, if you really don't you can stop reading now and/or disagree with all of the content i'm about to say, but if you do agree at least somewhat, please read on.) unfortunately, as much as making others happy is almost a necessity in my life, like i always say, too much of a good thing is not always a good thing. i'm not one to lose self control and overindulge, no matter how hard circumstances may get. i think i've reached the point where i'm losing myself in the process of trying to make several other people happier. and i still want them to be happier than i am, always, i couldn't stand to see it any other way. but, this insane need to make sure they're happy is most certainly making me go against what morals i have built in all my years. i know my limits, but do i only know them because i keep pushing them forward? i'm not one to tolerate nonsense, or in more common terms bullshit. ask anyone who knows me even in the slightest, i'm stubborn and i get mad when i feel i should. which is why it's so hard for me to wrap my mind around the idea that i'm permanently keeping my mouth closed shut when it comes to the actions i'm making. but i honestly only make them to get the satisfaction of making several others happy, even though that's not a legitimate enough excuse, i'm sure.
i wish there was more i could say, more that i could explain so that i could bring you to a better understanding, but i can't. hopefully, on my own, i'll find a reasonable medium. and as far as i'm concerned, i will. time tells all, my friend. too bad my impatience will almost surely drive me insane.
ps.
HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY COREY ALEXANDER RIZZI-WISEEEE! i want you to know how freaking amazing you are, and how insanely lucky i am to have such a charismatic, loving, considerate, hilarious, and downright BAMF best friend such as yourself! i hope your day is full of smiles, laughs, and a whole lotta wonderful :) you deserve it probably more than anyone else i know. as i am writing this, i can see your profile picture, and it makes me happy corey! hahaha i've never seen so much badass in one picture, my friend. corey, we go way back (kind of). all the way back in 7th grade when i sat behind you and made fun of you for talking to yourself and stuck pencils through your mini-fro. you've been there for me through the fun times, the sad times, the weird times, and the DOWNRIGHT awkward times, and you always know what to say! the best thing about you is that you know how weird, stupid, creepy, annoying, and moody i am, and you still love me all the same :) you gots to be the greatest, dear, and i hope your 16th year is one to remember! (even though you can't drive til you're like 21... hahah suckaaaa!)
I LOOOOOOOOVE YOUUUUUU COREYYY!<3333333333333
yo bffaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeae,
desiree varsha srinivas (:
goodnight world!